Toren Atkinson’s Absolute Blog

Top Story: Moviegoer Nerd Seeks Accompaniment
The Return of the King is now playing at Tinseltown! I am going to see it on Thursday at noon. Best seats in town. Only six dollars. Bubble Tea nearby. Anyone care to join?

Boycotter Vindicated Again; Gloats
“While promoting the second volume of the series, opening theatrically on April 16th, Tarantino revealed that he plans to recut both films together for a special theatrical release later in the year.”

Can I just say: Ahhhhhhhh-hahahahahahahahahahaaaaa!

It’s a very exciting time, being in the company of squid experts, albeit online. They have welcomed me with open arms. More on this later. In the meantime, did you know that Canada has finally banned baby walkers?

Also, American scientists announced that frequent ejaculation can help prevent prostate cancer? Words to live by.