Toren Atkinson’s Absolute Blog

So - House of Flying Daggers. Very very pretty. And an excellent movie…until the end. I don’t want to SPOIL anything for you, because it’s still worth seeing, but the ending is ridiculously drawn out and melodramatic. The fight scenes were excellent and they weren’t just cut thrust dodge parry, they used the environment to excellent effect. I think sometimes wuxia films go a little too far with the superhuman abilities, and that’s never more clear than in House of Flying Daggers. Jumping really high - practically flying - I’ve accepted that. Throwing knives and having them defy the laws of physics like Batman’s batarangs…that’s a little tougher to swallow.

The Christmas season doesn’t have much tradition for me…except the playing of Baldur’s Gate. Last year I didn’t have much time to waste, but this year (once my last drawing assignment was finally pegged) I have had plenty of free time, which I am putting to good use putting xvarts and tasloi to the sword. Hey - I think I’ll go do that now.

OK let’s see now…

For Christmas…

I got…

Some awesome brown and orange Converse shoes from Marlo. SO EXCITING!
An uglydoll (”Target“) also from Marlo. Very cute. He is the sentinel of my bed, along with my plush squid.
Some raspberry rhubarb jam, which I haven’t tried yet. From Marlo’s folks.
A little puzzler tile game which was fun.
A 365 trivia calendar
Sripey socks! Three pairs! From Marlo!
A paper cat from Paul/Kelly/Kelly’s sister whose name I forget but MIGHT be Nicole.
Something else that I forget, but somebody will remind me and then I’ll edit this post and this sentence will be completely replaced.

Plus the stuff I’ve already mentioned.

On boxing day I bought myself a couple of roleplaying books (maps, actually - 2 sets of generic maps) and the Metric album and the new Helmet album which I didn’t even know existed until I was standing in line at Virgin. Marlo also got me some more D&D minis which is good - we got (amongst others) the myconid and the dire fiendish weasel. Seriously. Still hoping to find the gibbering mouther http://www.popularcollections.com/ddab50.html

Isn’t it interesting how as you get older, the age difference between people you associate with - even are friendly with - becomes wider and wider. Most teens won’t have anything to do with others outside a few years difference in age, but when you’re thirty, you can have friends who are twenty and forty, or more. And when you’re 10, you want nothing to do with those filthy 8-year-olds. And when you’re 1, you won’t even talk to an embryo.

If I had to choose just one thing to eat for the rest of my life, it would be Panago’s thin crust kalamata olive and sun dried tomato pizza with feta cheese substituted for the mozza.

Marlo and I tried, very unsuccessfully, to find a copy of the Lord of the Rings trilogy box set (extended edition, of course), today. We tried A&B, Futureshop, and Virgin. If you want to steal something from Futureshop, do it on Boxing Day, because it is as close to bedlam as you will ever find, and the security buzzers go off so regularly so as to be rendered ineffectual. Anyway, if you can recommend somewhere that we might find the box set, it would make Marlo very happy. Marlo was pretty cheesed off at the height of our fruitless campaign, with hurting peds, spiteful store clerks, and the aforementioned bedlam, but by the time we were on our way home from seeing House of Flying Daggers she was in very good spirits. I love being downtown and realizing we have nothing planned and Tinseltown is just a few blocks away.

I’ve heard this from a couple people - and they’re right. It doesn’t feel like Christmas yet. Certainly it doesn’t feel like Christmas will be here in 2 days. Less, really. I’m not sure why it is - maybe I’m not playing enough video games (my own personal hexmas tradition). I’m sure my day job has something to do with it, too, despite the Christine Aguilera christmas song they’ve been playing on the radio there, which may be the new worst song in the world. The good news is I am off until the 29th, and they fed us pizza yesterday. Tomorrow I’ll be hanging out with Marlo’s family and then the day after, I’ll be hanging out with more of Marlo’s family!

Advance Christmas presents: An Edward Gorey calendar from Stewie; A spiff-tastic personally silk-screened orange bunny t-shirt from Yvonne!

So, as I mentioned, Morbo and I watched the extended edition of Return of the King. I think it’s my least favourite of the trilogy, but that has to do with Tolkein as much as it does Peter Jackson, I’m sure. Seeing it the second time a few weeks ago definitely didn’t have the same impact as seeing it the first time in the theater. I actually got pretty tired of most of the main characters. I was tired of Frodo and Sam and Aragorn doing the same thing all through the movie. The most interesting character work in King was in and around Faramir’s father, the rest of it, for the most part, seemed same old same old. Even for movies I don’t like, I don’t usually say that they’re too long. If it’s a good film, I don’t mind it going on for 4 hours. But I will say it about Return of the King and here’s why: too much slow motion. I wonder just how much time would be shaved off the film if all the slow mo scenes were done at real time, or go mo as I like to call it.

Specifically, for the extended edition, there was some stuff I liked and some stuff I didn’t like. Gimli and dwarfs in general were made fun some more, which is lame. There was a new character called the Mouth of Sauron which I thought was great - he was played by that guy in Road Warrior who flew the gyrocopter (he’s apparently going to be in Revenge of the Sith, too). The scene where Saruman gets impaled I found extremely silly, as was the tidal wave of skulls in the…grotto of the dead. Gandalf’s confrontation with the Witch King was interesting and I think it would have been fine to keep it in the theatrical cut.

One of the best (and coolest) foes in the entire story are the ring wraiths, I don’t know why they had to kick the Witch King up a notch from what he looked like in the Fellowship - I liked him better without the funky helmet and giant flail. It just seems they went over the top in King, I guess that’s what you get when Peter Jackson is at the helm. But it’s still a cool movie. It’s very pretty, the fight scenes are dynamic and interesting despite the fact that they go on and on and involve so many combatants, and Andy Serkis’ work as Gollum is no less amazing than in Two Towers.

The extras are pretty fantastic. We didn’t have time to listen to the audio commentaries, but we watched a lot of the documentaries and I would say that as a selling point for the extended edition they exceed the deleted scenes. I’m just amazed at how much detail and craftsmanship they put into the props on that movie - things that you would never notice or even have the opporunity to see in the film. And to hear the actors and crew telling their stories and saying their goodbyes on set was just as emotional as any musically-enhanced, slow motion drama scene.

I got sick this weekend! So that’s fun. I got sick on Friday night, when Marlo rented the special edition of Return of the King (more on that later). The sore throat and cough came with a massive headache and even though I was supposed to draw, I just couldn’t do anything. Going for a walk seemed to help the headache. We walked to Marlo’s on Saturday so she could get some stuff done at home and I laid down on her bed. The next thing I knew I was being woken up. I felt well enough to draw on Saturday so that’s what I did while Marmar and I watched the Return of the King extras (we both cried, it was cute. She asked me what was wrong with my nose). Today we walked to Starbucks in the sunshine and it took a lot out of me, but I’m good to draw some more, and people are coming over to watch The Big Kahuna tonight!

Does anybody want to see The Big Kahuna?
I’m trying to put together a movie night at Kodos’ place in the next 10 days or so.

Cheap
Stingy; miserly. chintzy, closefisted, illiberal, mean, miserly, narrow, niggardly, parsimonious, penny-pinching, penurious, skimpy, skinflint, tight, tight-fisted, ungenerous
Antonyms: extravagant, free-spending, generous, liberal

I was talking to Marlo today about my spending habits. I think I am known to some as being cheap. Currently, I don’t deny that. What some people don’t know is that my spending habits are directly in proportion to my financial situation. I think that is true for most people. But for the past 2 years, my savings have been in decline, and I now find myself as poverty-stricken as when I lived in Chilliwack. Some of my Chilliwack friends call me cheap. They knew me at a time when I was on welfare for a couple years. Before I saved up enough money to move out of Chilliwack, I was working at The Book Man for 2 hours a day (except on Sunday), and then was supplemented by welfare, insofar as I was making exactly the same amount of money working as I was when my only income was from welfare, because I was still below the poverty level.

At the high mark in my bank account, I had over $7000. That was when I was working at Macneill Library Service/National Book Service and drawing professionally at the same time. And that was when I went out to eat every night; and that was when I bought my deluxe 32″ tv to replace the crappy small b&w one; and that was when I took a trip to New York. That was when I didn’t need to pinch my pennies.

Now it’s come full circle and I am po’ again. For the first time in my life, I am in debt. (One of the reasons I didn’t go to university was because I never wanted to be in debt.) So once again I must be spendthrift. I cannot afford nice things. If it wasn’t for the 40% discount at Raincoast I’m pretty sure all this year’s Christmas gifts would be as they were last year - handmade or scrounged.

In summary, I do feel some shame about being known as ‘cheap,’ but the sad fact is until the crazy rich uncle I didn’t know about dies and leaves me his estate, my climb back into the world of faberge eggs and mink stoles will be a slow and ponderous one. Note that once I am there I will crush you all.

Friends I saw this week:
Marlo, Stewie, Paul, Kelly, Michelle, Ken, Warren, Slater, Kathryn, Jon, Jeff, Darcy, Taylor.

Friends I hope to see next week:
The usuals plus: Yvonne, Sheri & Stephane, Ursy, Janet & Brian, if we can get this BIG KAHUNA movie night organized (anyone else interested?); Michelle, Kelly, Paul.

Friends I won’t see this week because Fudge Zombies is cancelled (in part because I’ll be drawing):
Lisa, Palle, Mike J, Don, Pauline

There are things you have to do in life. Things you don’t want to do, but you just bite the bullet and push on through. Things like…oh you know, interacting with people. Especially people with whom you have little to nothing in common. I have to do this at work, and this week I had to do it at Marlo’s work. Marlo asked me to come to her office Christmas party. I pretty much knew what it would be like, and it lived up to my expectations. At the best of times I have troubles with crowds. I wouldn’t say that I’m ochlophobic, I don’t really fear crowds, I just get tense and quiet and close up in large groups. Or even small groups. I’m much better one on one, generally speaking.

I don’t know what to do with myself in social situations. This is why I suck at schmoozing and will probably only get so far in the entertainment industry (if I haven’t already peaked). I was 15 minutes early for the party, and the first thing I did after I showed up and was greeted by Marlo was grabbed a candy cane, so that I would have something to do with my hands and my mouth. I pretty much spent the entire party eating, until I started to feel sick. We mostly spent the party at Marlo’s work area or moving from room to room quickly and with purpose. When I went to the bathroom, I felt a tremendous pressure temporarily relieved, and I don’t mean from my bladder. I have to imagine most people have felt the the same way at some time or another - leaving a crowded, noisy room, closing the door behind you into this quiet, intimate space - leaning against the wall and breathing out a massive sigh. I know Marlo feels the same way. If she didn’t have to be there, she wouldn’t have been. I didn’t have to be there, but the fact is I care deeply for Marlo and in the big picture it’s a minor inconvenience. Like I say, it’s something we all have to do. I would certainly support her in more ways than to weather a few hours of discomfort at a party with lots of free food, and be happy to do it.

The irony is, of all parties, that’s probably the kind of party that I most enjoy - the subdued, adult, hors d’oeuvred party where you can sit down and chit chat, rather than a raucous beerfest with music so loud you can’t hear anything. The problem was, I didn’t know anyone there (with the obvious exception) and I didn’t have any great motivation to get to know any of them. There were a few people that I did not find outwardly …uninviting. There were maybe a handful of people with whom I imagined I could have a conversation without trying to find the first opportunity to squirm away, but even better than following through on that was keeping to myself and to Marlo and nibbling away at chocolate and cheese until other people started to leave so that it was not indecorous that we do likewise.

Marlo says she’s socially retarded. That’s one more thing that we have in common. Solidarity!